The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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