you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
