Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
