Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
