fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
