whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
