marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize
