I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
how does that bad decision feel?
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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