After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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