kristin has been a bad kristin
I think im going to throw up on grandma
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
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