Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize