on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
