I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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