He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You ruined the universe
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
