Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
