the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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