my text book just quoted the cookie monster
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
