y did u give ur computer a hand job?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Randomize
