that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
