you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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