CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Randomize
