White coat. Heels.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
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