Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize