She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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