i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
