do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
