oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
