He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
