i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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