the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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