It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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