I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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