i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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