quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
