i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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