Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Is it because I queefed?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize