You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
