I puked a lego.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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