just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Panties = found
Randomize
