she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize