At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
should my penis look like a turkey
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
