honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I have aggressive nipples.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
