physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
