Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
