Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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