i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Randomize
