...so i touched it.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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