I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
