The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
