My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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