Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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